We Can’t Be Stopped

Pork In The Park 3 went down, got to Dolores which has been undergoing a bit of a crackdown lately. I don’t really like cops or rules so I figured fuck it I’m posting up and doing the damn thing. I’ve done this a few times already and figured I should be cool

set my shit up and got to work hella early.

But apparently I didn’t expect the fucking atmosphere to try and shit on my parade of pork shoulder. Turns out San Francisco decided to have a goddamn thunderstorm for the first time in the history of the fucking universe. It was crazy as shit too, transformers exploding and fires from lightening strikes. The sky was not dicking arond this morning. I checked the weather though and it was suppose to clear up so I said fuck it and stuck it out. Sat in the truck and watched rain drops sizzle on my grill.

@sergdun Vietnamese cabby talking about “some crazy dude bbqin in the rain by himself at Delores early in the morning”. Ha.

-RevUnderPants
Meat was doing fine regardless

While I could deal with the rain and all that bullshit what I couldn’t deal with was the fucking cops rolling up on me. I see dude strolling up with his fucking citation book and figure I should probably turn down Mack Attack and deal with this bullshit. Dude asks for id and checks the shit while he fills out his No Fun Allowed slip. He realizes my birthday is in a few days and gives me a break but tells me I got to move. I explain that I’ve done this before and the park dudes are cool with it as long as I clean up. He tells me the rangers are chickenshits and say that but then call the cops and cry about people bbqing & drinking in the park. Then dude gives me some retarded opened ended answer like telling me to pack it up and move “if you can.” If I fucking can? So I can stay? He doesn’t give me an answer and basically it boils down to I can kick it but if his lieutenant comes through I’m getting a ticket and kicked out.

I get on my phone and start trying to find another park that allows portable bbq’s. Well the city’s website fucking sucks dick like a motherfucker so I can’t come up on shit. Fortunately some friends stop by and I remembered about Mission Playground which is pretty fucking close by. I didn’t know if bbq’s were allowed but fuck it. that spot is usually just a spot for brown bag drinkers anyways.

I load the grill in the back of the truck with the shoulder still on and we jet over to Valencia. Post up and get the fire going again. I lost about 40-60 minutes worth of cooking because of all the temperature drops and shit but whatever at least I was still cooking. The shittiest part about Mission Playground was that there weren’t any bathrooms and I was ready to crack some fucking beers. Turns out The Phoenix was across the street and they didn’t say anything when I hollered at their urinals so shit was all good.

I got my meat going again but shit was on hella delay which totally fucked me up because at Dolores I was on fucking point, got there hella early and was evening planning to be able to let the shoulder rest for 30 minutes. The whole moving around shit just fucked me all up so I had to bring the fire up and start pushing the meat. I ended up with chopped pork as opposed to pulled but whatever it was still tasty as fuck. Especially those little fat nuggets of awesome. I had a new knife as well which made short work of everything. I’ve been using my wife’s dull as fuck knives for 6 years now and decided to finally cop a new chef’s knife. I had a bunch of gift certificates so i used those fuckers up and grabbed this 8″ shun

Best move ever, fucking shit I didn’t realize how much of a pain in the ass my old knives were. Seems like I should have made this move years ago but I don’t know I think more about buying tools than kitchenware (I really want a 36v bosch hammerdrill right now). Really though the main tools I real use for this shit is a grill, tongs, sauce, brush and some marathon beer.

Anyways in the end everyone got fed, a little later but it went down. I had time to make a slaw right there and Ryan Farr dropped off some of his hotdogs, Acme buns and his money sauce. Those were lifesavers cause I was able to tide some people over with delicious hotdogs as they waited for the pork to take even longer. I don’t really have any photos of the final product because I was busy but I’m sure my friends took some. I’ll post them up when they get on the internets. It’s 9am on a sunday and I’m just banging this post out real quick because sleeping is boring.

and internet photos come through