I don’t like being from where ever the fuck I live. I’ve always been the dude from another place. When i go anywhere i claim SF, in SF I’m still from Texas, in Arizona I was from Texas, for a bit in Texas I was from AZ, but originally in Tx I was from Mexico. The point is for some reason I’ve always repped the fact that I wasn’t from there, that I wasn’t like YOU. I was built from a different plan, no matter what. I’ve always had a disdain for the born and raised, that was always so boring to me. Like a bitch who married his high school sweetheart. I view it as the weak fuck who settled for where his nuts were the bluest.
I mean yeah it’s cool to be an OG but for me I was always the new kid, the one building a different rep, with friends who were always cooler than you lames from what ever new school I was at. I’m coming up on 9 years in SF, the city has been good too me, took me years before I would rock an SF hat just out of the principle of the shit but I still ride for texas.
Texas built me, the humidity is a hug from a wind that loves me. Texas knows what color I am suppose to be. SF has been trying to change that shade for years. But there is a reason I’ve never been away from Texas for too long, I don’t use maps in Texas, I drive places because of childhood memories, be it highway 21, the loop in Houston, it’s why I always look for the canopy of trees in bastrop, fear for jail time in van horn, fiend for a pint of blue bell, Austin is where I saw my first ToysRus and immigration office, can only be in lubbock at night,San Antonio holds the ghosts of lawyers, hate Dallas with a passion, Temple reminds me of friends I lost when their parents went to study in Waco, el paso is 4am mexirave, I met relatives in a Laredo greyhound station that I would never ever see again, the valley is a place my family hates and victoria was were my mom gave up driving, corpus Christi is where I was force fed shrimp and told my allergic reaction was just whining, Tyler is where I first learned to hate Jesus, College Station is where I learned that Jesus was a republican.I miss the smell of smoked refried beans on the muddy shores of lake Summerville.
I like texas because for all it’s imperfections it is a place that I will always understand. It makes me want to leave the bay, no matter how much I like SF, Texas is always calling with cheaper homes and a warm embrace. But like that girlfriend your mom liked you deny it. The bay has been good to me and I’m not leaving anytime soon but I always have to make the pilgrimage back to the holy land that made me hate so much.
This is what I type in my phone at 6 am in a hotel in Austin when I can’t sleep and am beat up from a week of moshing.